Over the years I’ve had dozens or probably hundreds of request as how do you get permission to detect on farmland. This is the alternative version how Not too.
Make sure you have loads of tattoos on display, love and hate on your knuckles will do nicely.
Rings through your lip or nose, although the farmer has probably kept bulls at some stage, so he might relate to these.

Bang on his door early Sunday morning, and say ‘’err mate can dig up some treasure on yer land’’.
Tell him you’ve fallen in love with one of his sheep.

Tell him your Paul the vexatious blogger with incredibly itchy underpants.

Say some ugly woman at the bottom of his drive, said you were the owner, then find out it was his wife.
Wear loads of Camo, but make sure he can see you when he reverses out of his barn on his tractor.
Tell him the farm looks much bigger during the day.