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Author Topic: Down the pub !!!  (Read 3322 times)
dingdong
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MAD COWS EAT METAL DETECTORISTS !!!🐂🐂🐂🐂🐂🐂


« on: November 06, 2015, 09:29:18 PM »

Ya know,this old detecting game can get you some strange requests,
The other day a bloke that comes round to do a bit of gardening and odd jobbing
No not(Mellors)!!
We got to talking about detecting and he said that the landlord of his local was having trouble trying to locate an old water pipe that was supposedly blocked off years ago(behind the bar) and had started to leak,and would have to start digging up the floor,I said why didn't he use one of those hand held detectors to locate the pipe.
Yesterday, I get a phone call asking if I could go and take a look with my detector!!!
So,today,armed with detector and pointer me and this guy get to the pub,landlord,shows me roughly the place,well,the floor was covered in soppy cardboard,bar towels,etc,well there was no place to swing a detector,so it was down to the pointer,and within five minutes I had located the pipe,my mate then starts to chisel away at the concrete floor,eventually exposing the offending pipe,during this time the coffee's were mounting up,when I happened to mention that I had lived and worked in Spain for ten years,and it got onto cheap booze,that in turn got me talking about a Spanish "winter warmer" called a "carachio", ithen went onto explain that it was a very strong black coffee,with a slice of lemon plus a very large " slurp" of brandy,well,that was it!!!
At least three hours later I was driven home by the landlord,pi%%%d out of my head,having had more than my share of "hospitality"
And apparently, I agreed to play keyboards in the pub over Christmas!!
Oh!! My Bl###y head!!!😕☕☕
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b.buoy
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« Reply #1 on: November 06, 2015, 09:41:58 PM »

nice story.
I got asked to locate a lost sprinkler on the local golf club some while ago. The pipes were plastic but the sprinkler head was metal.
Found it after a short search and got a polite thank you for my efforts. They wouldn't even let me detect on the greens.
Theres just no justice sometimes. Wink
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Val Beechey
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« Reply #2 on: November 07, 2015, 12:04:34 AM »

Well now, aint that odd.  2 days ago, just passing one of my neighbours houses with the dogs, saw them in the adjoining field so waved and shouted a cheery good morning. I was greeted with waves of the  arms and 'we hoped we'd see you' They asked, did I mind popping  round with my detector, Malcolm had lost his hearing aid  Shocked
I said it was unlikely I would find it, thinking it was plastic. Ah yes says Malc but it's got a battery in it. Anyway I went round after I'd walked the dogs, to show willing. Where do you think you lost it, I asked. In the chicken run was the answer  Roll Eyes
In mid construction of said run  it dropped out twice so he put in on top of the nest box which sticks out at the side of the chicken shed.  Ann had lifted the lid to get the eggs and not seen it. Now bear in mind the enclosed run he was making is 6ft sq with wire netting all round and you can see what a task I had. Hopeless. Every swing picked up the wire so I listened for any slight change in the signal. All i managed was a huge rusty nail, 2 staples and his hammer.
It was decided in the end that most likely one of the chickens had probably picked it up thinking it was worm. Tell you what, those birds have got to lay a lot of eggs to make up for the 850 quid he paid for the hearing aid.
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Cymro
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« Reply #3 on: November 07, 2015, 08:32:15 AM »

. Tell you what, those birds have got to lay a lot of eggs to make up for the 850 quid he paid for the hearing aid.

PARDON???
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dingdong
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MAD COWS EAT METAL DETECTORISTS !!!🐂🐂🐂🐂🐂🐂


« Reply #4 on: November 07, 2015, 06:05:43 PM »

Right Val,if the chickens have swallowed it all you need to do is get back round there with your pin-pointer, get someone to hold onto the chicken and give it once over and hey"dingdong" you got hearing aid,now,there are two options here,OPTION ONE...Put chicken into isolation and hope that nature will take its course!!!!!
OPTION TWO....Get chicken,deaden it off,withdraw internal contents,locate the
HEARING AID ,place chicken on roasting dish,put into oven on 190° for about 90mins, or until juices run clear...remove from oven...... HEN...joy !!!🐔!!!!!LOL👍
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Val Beechey
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« Reply #5 on: November 07, 2015, 08:30:05 PM »

That's what's called lateral thinking Chris.  Unfortunately there's 14 of the little beggers and Ann loves every one of them.
John says, serves him right for spending that sort of money. Maybe the next one will be a NHS one.
Must admit to being a bit disappointed, and I didn't even get a drink out of it.
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dingdong
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MAD COWS EAT METAL DETECTORISTS !!!🐂🐂🐂🐂🐂🐂


« Reply #6 on: November 07, 2015, 08:42:52 PM »

Never mind Val!!!!........some people !!!😬 Roll Eyes
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Johnboy25
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« Reply #7 on: November 08, 2015, 07:35:48 AM »

Ha Ha  Cheesy nice one .
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Resurgam
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« Reply #8 on: November 08, 2015, 08:22:40 AM »

Perhaps he is henpecked and has hidden the hearing-aid himself!  Grin

I was once asked to assist an old couple find the wife's rings, that she thought she had lost on the beach. Made arrangements to meet them on the beach, so they could show me roughly where they thought she may have lost the jewellery. Before we could keep the arrangements; it turned out that she found said rings in a carton of tomatoes, in the refrigerator.

Which reminds me. Many years ago, my wife had the habit of frequently removing her rings and I kept warning her that they would get lost. One day, just to teach her a lesson I hid them. When she did realise that the rings were missing I had forgotten where I had hidden them.

Never did find my wife's rings and had to replace them.  Cry
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Minelab Safari + Quest Q40 + Garrett ProPointer + Patience, Persistence, Knowledge, and loads of determination. Wink

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